Leave the Light On.

I've sat down several times in the last several days. My fingers poise ready at the keys, my thoughts and feelings wait breathlessly on the edge of spilling over. In my head, I'm telling you things that I'm thinking and feeling in a way that will benefit you, help you articulate and examine your own life and share that with others, make you feel better about the ample amount of things you deal with everyday.

And then this is what comes out:

This sucks. 

Life is hard. 
The End.

Don't like that one? Me neither.

Turns out it's not easy to write when you're sitting in the dark.

Lately I've had some hard days, friends. They're good, in a see-the-big-picture kind of way, in a you-know-Who-loves-you kind of way, but they're still hard. Details spared, I've been thinking a lot about the things that make our fragile, sensitive human spirits rise up out of the hard, frustrating, frightening mire of everyday life. What inspires us when we're in the dark, desolate places of our lives? And why?

I don't have those answers yet, but I'll leave you with a few of these, which have a brighter, clearer perspective than I do at the moment. Sometimes, when you can't say it, feel it, see it, you just have to surround yourself with people who can in hopes that some of their light seeps into the dark spaces in your soul.

A few lights for you:

A life-affirming quote from Anais Nin.

A good thought from Jon Acuff: We don't have to finish what we don't start.

Remember, friends: time is of the essence, so don't waste it.

A daily dose of encouragement for those who write, freelance, or can appreciate a blog that is both well written AND well designed.

The sweet, soothing lullaby of a new album from one of my all time favorites.

Song lyrics you can cling to and sing to yourself in the dark:

"I was walking far from home
But I carried your letters all the while
I saw lovers in a window
Whisper, 'Want me like time, want me like time'
I saw sickness, bloom in fruit trees
I saw blood and a bit of it was mine...
I was walking far from home
Where the names were not burned along the wall
Saw a wet road form a circle
And it came like a call, came like a call
From the Lord. "

And a special love link to all the people in my life that make it worth it - the everyday. Dark or light, I know I'm not sitting alone. [Galatians 6:2]


Bob Bittner said...

Sorry to post so much here, but I just wanted to mention this...

It's okay to follow the "this sucks" thoughts to see where they go. I've run into this myself, especially when I'm writing Christian songs: We tend to set up the negatives that can happen, and then conclude with the solution, so people don't think that God isn't able to save us...from whatever we might happen to need saving at the time. But sometimes that's a cop-out. Sometimes we need to wander a bit in the wilderness, to discover the truth for ourselves and not just accept the easy, Pollyanna answers. There's a reason why we have so many despairing psalms, why we have Lamentations. Sometimes we have to acknowledge that, yes, some days life really does suck and there's not a damn thing we can do about it.

Make sense?

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