June was a month of many changes. Despite the iTunes debacle, which has yet to be resolved and did yet more damage AFTER my last post, the hubs and I were able to move into an apartment and out of my in-laws place. And the peasants rejoiced! Just kidding. There was much rejoicing, by all involved. I am thankful for the love, support, and heavy lifting everyone did as we made this transition. We are truly blessed with amazing friends and family.
At the same time that I was moving into a new apartment, I got to move into a new office! That's right: all in one month, I started full-time in the position I've been working for a year and a half, I moved to a new apartment with my hubs, and I got my own office. It doesn't get much better than that, but it wasn't an easy month, that's for sure.
I - once again - feel moved by revelations, by an increasing awareness of many different truths, but mostly:
1. "Life is what happens when you're making other plans," Lennon so wisely noted. June was supposed to be our month to save a nice little nest egg before we moved in. The iTunes thing happened at the worst possible moment, making our saving plans impossible. But we survived it. And these unpredictable experiences are a fact of life. So how will we deal with it?
Mario's comment in my previous post is very true: while it's great that Matt and I were able to support each other through a crazy experience, it does highlight our insecurities about money, which can (and does) cripple our ability to make wise financial decisions. It's time to reevaluate our attitudes and how they can affect our future finances.
2. I have no other way to articulate it than this: God's fidelity. If you're not religious or you don't have faith in Christ, please hear me out.
This is what I've experienced: His provision in all circumstances.
It's not coincidence; it's too perfect for that. It's not my own doing; I'm not smart enough or strong enough to make these things happen. I just know that whenever I think 'Well, this is the end of the rope - we have no money, no way to make it, etc..." that's when something completely miraculous happens. And it's not what I expect or want to happen; it's a door that opens that I didn't know existed. And it's faithful - unending, never failing, even when I'm sure I don't deserve it.
It isn't blowing out a birthday candle and getting every present you hoped for. It's an unforeseen intersection of what you later realize you needed and what you could not imagine was possible. It's not finding the answer to the mystery; it's learning to be content with it. It's not wearing rose-colored glasses; it's removing tainted perspectives to see what's really there.
Opportunities come along, for us to give and to receive and to move forward, when we thought we were on the wrong side of a brick wall. We may not understand these circumstances for a long time, but choosing to see life for the short, unpredictable, sacred miracle that it is makes it easier to see the truth, in my experience.